Say What?

Last night the Bourne Identity was on, again, and as typical I was only half watching as really my husband is the one who can’t just sit in a room and have it be quiet.  I think after working in customer service at retail stores and now in a not-really-a-call-center-call-center ‘back-ground’ noise takes on a whole different meaning for me after 10+ years.  I want it quiet.

This isn’t about me going deaf, which some would argue would be a contributing factor to this article, but it’s about my not paying close enough attention to details, usually because I’m multi-tasking or just taking in a lot of information being presented at the same time.

Back to Jason Bourne, and more specifically his little red bag of cash and passports:

Fool Proof Plan to gain entrance to a locked building: Ring the bell for the one guy you know who's not home.

In the movie he gives it to Marie because it has a bank-load of various currency in it.  What it doesn’t have is a Visa, or a different identity for her, after all it’s the Bourne Identity, not the Marie Vagabond Girl’s Identity movie, and regardless we assume her large inheritance of cash is what went into her opening up the quaint scooter shop at the end of the movie (and judging by her hair growth from when given the bag to the end of the movie I’d guess at least 6 mo to a year had gone by).

I just spent an unhealthy half hour trolling for the “cherry on top” and couldn’t find it, but what you’ll see should cable replay this movie (ha,ha) is that Marie kept the red bag and made it into a hanging flower basket in her shop.  You see it clearly as she’s standing at the counter and Jason is greeting her from the door way.

If you don’t believe me, IMDb confirms it:

The small red duffel bag Jason Bourne takes from Gemeinschaft Bank in Zürich early in the movie when he cleans out the safety deposit box, and later gives to Marie when he sends her away, shows up again towards the end of the film as a hanging planter in Marie’s scooter rental shop.

This is not the first time I’ve totally blitzed over what amounts to obvious cookie crumbs if not outright written dialogue to only discover YEARS later I ‘missed the boat.’

Another fine example is the song by Aerosmith, “Dude (looks like a lady)”  I can tell you up until the summer of 2005 when someone corrected me, I had the strong and unwavering belief the title and subsequent lyrics were “Do It like a Lady.” Keep in mind when I was growing up in the large rural area of Dilley, Oregon (population 900 at the time) that we did not have cable and I did not have an MTV education.

Roughly what I believed I was hearing:

Dude looks like a lady (4x)

Replaced with… Do It Like a Lady (4x)

So never judge a book by its cover (In my mind that meant something like; She seems prim and proper)
Or who you gonna love by your lover
Love put me wise to her love in disguise
She had the body of Venus (She was a hot piece of @$$)
Lord imagine my surprise (here I just figured he was referring to she was into something kinda kinky, 3 some?)

Do It Like a Lady (4x)

Baby let me follow you down
Baby let me follow you down
Do me, do me, do me all night
Baby let me follow you down
Turn the other cheek dear
Baby let me follow you down
Do me, do me, do me,

(Golly gee, what could possibly refer to ‘going/following you down’ again w/out the context of the word “DUDE” this really changes the visual composition of this song in my mind’s eye)

What a funky lady
She like it like it like it like that (again with the kinky, whatever that may be)

+ there is a whole section of lyrics that I never really could understand what Steven Tyler was mumbling/screeching which turns out to also be a pretty important plot point to the song:

Cruised into a bar on the shore
Her picture graced the grime on the door
She a long lost love at first bite
Baby maybe you’re wrong but you know it’s alright
That’s right Backstage we’re having the time
of our lives until somebody say
Forgive me if I seem out of line
Then she whippedd out of her gun
tried to blow me away

And never heard: He was a lady

For the full lyrics in proper order, click here and read or click here and watch. Lets face it, that song is really about the guitar anyway.

Truly, upon someone laughing at me and me getting over my initial embarassment, because yes, in fact, I was singing out loud the chorus “DO IT LIKE A LADY” like some tone-deaf and moronic ninny when they looked at me and said, “What did you just say?”  I seriously didn’t believe them, and then I didn’t want to believe them after they printed me the lyrics, because darn it I kind of like the song my way.

Sadly another movie, which I actually adore and had seen again multiple times in High School completely slipped one past me.  I try to cut myself some slack by pointing out they put a LOT of jokes in this movie with both obscure and not-so-obscure references to the ‘prehistoric’ time of the 1990’s as a futuristic comedy; Demolition Man.

Featuring: Sylvester Stallone, Sandra Bullock, Wesley Snipes, Benjamin Bratt, and friggin’ Dennis Leary as a rebel leader, and a host of other pretty darn good supporting actors.  If you’ve not seen this movie it’s a visual treat just in the fact Wesley Snipes has bleach blonde hair and blue contacts for the role of bad guy, but seriously, it’s funny, go order it on Net Flix.

What did I miss?  It’s painful almost for me to admit it, but in the movie there are social changes in the ‘future’ that include no swearing (I’d be so hosed) and if you are heard swearing by any number of machines monitoring your behavior (besides the police themselves) you are demerited and a little ticket prints out and you have to pick it up. Well, Stallone’s character has a potty mouth, and he’s also confused by the new-fangled bathrooms that have only 3 sea-shells.  When he advised the group at the police station that the bathroom is out of toilet paper, they all laugh at him. The writers stick in some dialogue with Stallone and he drops a swear word, the machine beeps and squawks at him and a ticket is printed.  He walks over to the machine and rattles of a list of naughty words, grabs his tickets and says, “So much for the sea-shells.”

Ta-friggin’-dah, Comedy genius.  <— click to see the scene.

And I missed it.. like 5 times in watching the movie, completely flew over my head.  Maybe I was just staring at Benjamin Bratt’s beautiful skin tone and deep brown eyes.

So cute, even when 'grungy.' Brad, not Dennis! Sheesh.

OK, that is enough for now.  I just had to share.  Typically I catch the sneaky stuff, and a lot of the ‘oopses’ in movies, but every once in a while if it would have been a snake it would have bit me moments, well, bites me.


3 responses to “Say What?

  1. We don’t even want to start with the lyrics I have mangled. And then there are the commercials that I just don’t get and Mike has to explain. I never thought of myself as truly dumb but now I am beginning to wonder. Nah, I am a frekin’ genius compared to the majority of callers I help on a daily basis!

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